Been thinking a lot about personal responsibility, and the way some people take it on and others don’t. This is very different from you blaming yourself for every wrong thing that happens, or beating yourself up over something you said or did. That is not being responsible, that is being abusive. If you do that to yourself, please stop.
Taking personal responsibility, to me, is accepting that the thoughts you think are your own. And then understanding that these thoughts make you feel certain feelings. And when you feel a certain way, you act in accord with that feeling. So, taking personal responsibility is accepting you are in control of all of your own thoughts, feelings, actions and words. Ultimately, you are responsible for your results.
So many times, though, you might think you feel the way you do because someone said or did something “to” you. It’s always about someone else, isn’t it? Um, no, your feelings are actually always about you.
For example, if you meet a woman who acts with purpose and speaks with intention – and you don’t speak or act that way – you might think she thinks she’s better than you. You might even say, “She thinks she’s better than me.” But someone else might not interpret her that way at all. They might see her as competent or dynamic, or both.
And the woman in question is not thinking, “I’m better than she is.” She is thinking, “I got this, I’m good at this, this is easy, this is fun.” Whatever her actual thoughts are, her words and actions are coming from her feeling of self-confidence, not from a thought she’s having about you. (’cause her words and actions are not actually about you. Your words and actions are about you.)
Who’s the only person thinking inside your head? YOU.
If there’s a thought in your head, “She thinks she’s better than me” YOU think she’s better than you.
If there’s a thought in your head, “He thinks I’m unlovable” YOU think you’re unlovable.
And it’s not just about relationships with people. What about your relationship with food?
If there’s a thought in your head, “I’ll never lose weight.” YOU think you’ll never lose weight. After a while that thought becomes a belief. And it’s hard to do anything when you believe you’ll never do it. Lose weight, get married, start a business, have a child. Anything.
Think about that thing you really, really want.
Now think about how you think about yourself in relation to that thing.
Now do the math:
________________THE THING I WANT
____+ I DON’T BELIEVE I CAN HAVE IT
Does NOT = HAVING THE THING I WANT
When you’re ready to take responsibility for having the thing you want and you’re ready to have help to achieve it at last, I’m only a click away!
If these ideas resonate with you and you’re ready to change your life contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org and we can schedule a free, 20 minute phone call.
Right now, take a moment and affirm for yourself:
The best news I’ve had in a long, long time is – I’m responsible for my own results!