Dating, Relationships, Marriage, Business – to Thine Own Self Be True

Relationships, Love, Knowing Yourself, What You Really Want vs. What You think you want


To thine own self be true.

This is how you know yourself.

A few years ago I was about to cut across a parking lot to save myself a few steps, when I looked down and saw the ground was splattered with oil stains. I mean, for the first time in my life I really saw what I’d been walking on. In that moment I decided I was worth more. 

Enriched romantic relationships involve caring for each partner with respect and treating each other with dignity and the only relationship you’re guaranteed to be in ‘til death do you part is the one you have with yourself. 

I’m inviting you to think deeply about what caring for yourself really means, and to question the choices you’ve always made – especially the ones you’ve made for the sake of convenience. Self care is more than convenience and treating yourself with dignity and respect has a more long-lasting effect than the few seconds you may save. And if you’re looking for a partner who will treat you with dignity and respect, start that process now and be your own best partner!

In that parking lot I decided that going forward I’d always choose a dedicated walkway, for cleanliness and safety. I’ve applied this philosophy of respect vs. convenience to other values too, like choosing to buy whole fruit and cut it up myself rather than buy it pre-cut in plastic containers. The peace I feel in being actively aligned with my values is so much greater than any feeling I ever got from something being convenient.

When you start treating yourself every single day the way you want to be treated every single day that is going to truly enrich your life!

This is how you trust yourself.

One day last year I was leaving my neighborhood grocery store. There’s a little patch of grass at the curb and not only do I prefer to walk on a sidewalk than the parking lot, I would always rather walk on grass than pavement. I paused on this little patch of beautiful green grass and thought to myself, “I am so grateful to have a market I can walk to, and the ability to buy groceries.” And then it occurred to me that I was as happy in that moment as I could possibly ever be. Even if I were leaving the grocery store in Paris (living in Paris is a life dream/goal) and even if I were in a relationship with a wonderful man, I couldn’t be any happier than I was then.

I stepped off the grass and saw something on the sidewalk that looked like crumpled up money. I looked up and down the sidewalk and there was nobody there. I thought at first I’d found a dollar on the street and when I picked it up I saw that it was actually a twenty dollar bill.

If you think I was happy because I found $20 on the street please go back and read this again. I was already happy. I was already affirming to myself that I was happy. I was living fully in gratitude and affluence and I was practicing my own form of self care by walking across the grass and the sidewalk rather than the oily parking lot to save a few steps.

You know it doesn’t feel good when someone tells you he’ll do something and then doesn’t. Neither does it feel good when someone does something once and never again. Be the partner you seek. Enrich your own loving relationship with yourself. You learn to trust yourself by showing up for yourself over and over … and over again.

This is how you show up for yourself.

By the way, that was actually the second time I found $20. It happened again a third time, and I’m sure it will happen again. For a long time I had an affirmation; the universe is paving my path with twenty dollar bills!  

I don’t believe that I’m just lucky, I believe it’s because I am getting better and better at being consistent and honoring myself by showing up. You see, I found that third $20 lying on the sidewalk. I found it because I chose the safety and cleanliness of the sidewalk rather than cutting across the parking lot. I honored myself and saw the response.

There are a lot of good things in your life right now. Do you see them? Are you appreciating them and loving the life you have, or are you waiting for your life to look a certain way in order to be happy? If you believe there’s only one way for you to be happy, and it involves a certain man and a relationship with a certain label, you can make a different choice. 

You can have the enriched loving relationship you desire at any time, in any place. You can be happy now!

Consistently giving myself what I know feeds me in a truly nourishing way, being open, being available, being grateful, feeling affluent and abundant allows me to see what is true about my life right now, to feel happy always and enables me to see what is literally being dropped in front of me.

This is your life. The way it looks is up to you.

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