Here’s how:

Feel the way you want to feel then now.

Luxuriate in it. Revel in it. Absolutely soak in the feelings of desire, love and being cherished the way you would soak in a tub filled with foaming bath oil and rose petals.

This may sound a little crazy, but it’s the absolute truth – every feeling you want to feel at some time in the future is available to you right now. How is this possible? Because the way you feel is determined, not by your circumstances, but by what you think about your circumstances. 

• If you want to feel desired or loved or cherished, start thinking about what that really takes. You are a woman who is desirable, lovable and worthy of being cherished, even if there is no man in your life at the moment. Creating that belief and truly instilling it in your own heart is the first step to feeling every feeling you desire.

• Start to feel like a woman who is in a committed, monogamous relationship – like a woman in love. What must you think in order to develop those feelings? And once you’re feelin’ her, how does she act? What does she say and do? How does she show up? How will you behave when you’re married? Do you think you’ll be very different than you are now? If so, figure out what you have to think to create the feelings that will fuel your actions, and do it now!

Pretty soon you’ll feel so loved and cherished and desired, and you’ll be exuding that energy, and you’ll be so attractive to so many people, you won’t even notice you’re not actually in a relationship. Yet.

Make time for dating now.

You are absolutely in love with your career and although that’s awesome, there are other things you want to be in love with as well. You want a partner, marriage and a family – you might not want to have children yourself, but you might … or you might be open to a partner who already has children. Either way, a big step on the way to marriage is being in a committed, monogamous relationship.

You know how you always say you will make time to be in a relationship but you don’t have time to date? Make time now. If you don’t make time to date, you won’t know how to make time to be in a relationship. You won’t know how to make different choices than the ones you make now. Being in a relationship will not magically enable you to say no to working overtime or always being the one to babysit your nephew at the last minute.

Telling yourself over and over that you don’t have time to do something you want to do, that will enable you to create something you want, isn’t serving you. It’s actually making it hard for you to believe you’ll ever have it. And when something is hard for you to believe, how motivated do you feel to take all the actions necessary to go after it?

It starts to feel more like a job, doesn’t it? And you’ve already got a job, what you want is to create balance and a right order in your life by giving more time and attention to your love relationships and less to the business ones. That takes you doing something different than you’ve done before.

Be happy now.

Postponing your happiness into the future is making you feel like someone who doesn’t ever get what she wants. And when you constantly feel like you don’t get what you want in life one of two things can happen. Either you’ll get burnt out and stop going after what you want; (i.e. quit dating) or when you do get what you want (falling in love with your absolute right match!) you won’t recognize him because you’ve set yourself up to believe you can only be happy when you’re in a relationship at some distant time in the future, not now.

Happiness is a feeling, and as you saw above, every feeling that you might possibly want to feel at some time in the distant future is available to you right now.

I realize this may be a foreign concept, because it’s so different from what we’ve all been taught about life, right? We’re supposed to go out and get something or do something or be something different, and then we get to feel different. But the truth is, it’s the exact opposite! 

Your thoughts are creating your feelings. Your feelings are fueling your actions. Your actions are ultimately creating your results. You think, you feel, you do. That’s the truth of how you have what you have now and how you get what you want instead.

Now, what are you going to do about it?

This is your life. Having everything you want is up to you.

#havemorelove #havefundating #singleandspiritual #lovedating #lovemakeovers

#datingandrelationships #onlinedating #midlifedating