If the only reason you can’t is because you never have
See this sea of roses? It reminds me of what my life is like since I met my boyfriend.
We met online, and in deference to there being shelter-in-place orders in effect we took it slow. We messaged, we spoke, we video-chatted, we went for a walk around the lake. He said he’d like to see me again and I said yes. And when he asked what I’d like to do on what would be our first official date I mustered all my courage and said …
There’s this piece of furniture I want to refinish, would you please help me with that?
Not only did he say yes, he showed up with all the tools we’d need and a dozen roses!
And he’s been bringing me flowers ever since.
There was a time in my life when I said, I can’t have the kind of relationship I want because if it was meant to happen it would have by now.
And then I sabotaged every relationship with every man who came even close to being what I wanted.
I said I can’t so I didn’t. So then I got to be right about it never having happened.
Dating was really, really hard because I made it that way. Eventually I realized my way wasn’t working and I hired a coach who helped me see how I was creating what I said rather than what I wanted. My coach showed me all the things I was doing to stand in the way of my own happiness, and I learned how to kick those habits to the curb and experience the joy I saw other women having.
Do you want to keep being right or do you want to roll in a bed of roses? You really do get to choose! And when you’re ready to create what you want to happen rather than what you say will happen, hiring a coach will get you there much more quickly than you trying to figure it out on your own. Think of me as your GPS for dating!
If you’re really ready, get on a 20-minute discovery call with me and find out how to get from where you are now to where you want to be: https://lenacoachsession.as.me/
If the only reason you won’t is because you never did
How much of a risk-taker are you? If I said I was going hot air ballooning or parasailing tomorrow, or to Morocco next month, would you jump right up and say, take me with you!
I’ve never considered myself much of a risk-taker, especially when it comes to physical activities, although I have gone hot air ballooning and parasailing and when my friend told me she was going to Morocco in a month I heard the words, take me with you! coming out of my mouth before I realized I’d even thought them. And she did.
Morocco was exotic and amazing and ballooning and parasailing were both pure, joyous fun! I checked them off the list on two consecutive birthdays.
That was after the birthday when I got my tattoo.
For years I wanted a tattoo, and I could never settle on what it would be. I decided and then changed my mind dozens of times. I also wondered where I’d go to get it. Then one day I wandered into a tattoo shop and started talking to this artist who I liked immediately. I liked her work, too, and I walked out with her card and a new determination.
After years of indecision, within a few weeks I knew exactly what I wanted to live with for the rest of my life and I got it done. I could have said I won’t do it. I could have kept looking for the perfect idea for the rest of my life. Instead, I made up my mind and it all came together perfectly. As if it was meant to be … 😉
If you’re not in the relationship you want it’s not because you haven’t found the right person yet. You haven’t found the right person yet because you’re not determined enough to figure out what’s stopping you. Lucky for you, I am an expert at figuring out what’s stopping you!
Let’s get on a free 20-minute video call together so you can discover what’s keeping you from finding him and what to do about it: https://lenacoachsession.as.me/
You need to have a better reason not to
Whether you’re like I was and think you somehow don’t deserve to have what you desire or you won’t do what you need to do to make it happen, the result is the same – you’re not in the relationship you really, really want. Isn’t it time to figure out why?
What rational reason is there for you to keep holding yourself back?
Do you think it will be hard? You do hard things every day.
Do you think it will be painful? You feel the pain of not having a partner now.
Creating the enriched romantic relationship you crave, having a partner who shows up for you in every way you’ve ever wished for and in many ways you’ve never imagined, isn’t hard. It isn’t beyond you. It isn’t the domain of every other woman on the planet except you. And just like my tattoo, finding out how you’re standing in your own way doesn’t have to cause you pain.
When you’re ready to create a different outcome in your dating and relationships than the one you keep getting on your own, DM me or leave a comment so we can talk!
Discover why he’s not here yet and what you can do about it. Click on the link and schedule your free call: https://lenacoachsession.as.me/