How or Why?

Do you find yourself wondering how? When there’s something you’d like to do, do you spend a lot of time trying to figure out how to do the entire thing before you even start? Do you ask other people how they do the thing you want? Do you ask a lot of other people?

It’s reasonable to think forward to at least the first step in a process so you can be prepared ahead of time if you need tools, and yet…

Do you ever wonder why? When there’s something you’d like to do, do you spend a lot of time thinking about your reason for doing it?

Your why is your fuel. That’s the thing that will keep you moving forward toward your goal. If you’re fueling a rocket it’s going to take a higher octane – greater focused attention – than if you’re fueling a lawn mower.

Do you want to be in a romantic relationship with a man of good character whose qualities beautifully align with and support your values, with whom you can create a loving partnership?


Because of the way you think you’ll feel when you’re in it.

As humans we are motivated to want things because of how we think we’ll feel when we have them. But in actuality, your feelings fuel your actions. Meaning, you are already feeling something and then taking an action propelled by that feeling.

And the thoughts you have – about yourself, men, relationships in general, create your feelings. Yes, really. You think that you believe (think) what you see (result). In reality, you see (result) what you believe (think).

You probably think you’ve done everything possible in your search, don’t you?

You’ve tried all the apps, you’ve been to singles mixers, you’ve been to bars and MeetUps and church socials… you think that’s how to do it.

If you’ve been asking yourself, “Where do I find him?” you’re asking the wrong question.

The question to ask is, “Who am I being now and who do I want to be when I’m with him?” The answer to this question is your rocket fuel!

Are you really ready to create an enriched, romantic relationship? Do you desire that one long-lasting love?

If you’d like to apply this in your life and don’t know how, please go to to schedule a free, 20-minute coaching session.

Take 20 minutes to make 2020 different. For free!