When you meet a man for the very first time and he says or does something that you don’t like what’s your first reaction?
Are you curious? Do you give yourself time to observe him, and think about it and try to determine what his behavior represents? What feelings might he be having in that moment? What thoughts might he be thinking? Who might he be, in all of his human complexity?
Or do you judge him as a loser, a jerk, emotionally unavailable, a player, narcissistic or any of the myriad other titles being bandied about in the dating world these days?
Our actions and behaviors are what people see of us, they are how people experience us. They are the masks we wear in the world.
What if our relationships are meant to be opportunities for us to grow? (hint, they are) What if other people are gifts and when you judge them and label them as bad you’re pushing away those gifts? Open that gift – be open and curious and non-judgmental and allow yourself to wonder. That’s the first step to you actually changing your life.
Ask yourself why – really, why – are you attracted to him? Why are you attracted to someone who is aloof or standoffish or emotionally unavailable?
Here’s a big secret, Smart Girl: Having More Love is not about who you attract, it’s about who you are attracted to.
Once you allow yourself to see who you are attracted to you can learn why. And when you learn why you will know what has been stopping you from actually creating the love you’ve been saying you really, really want.
Sign up at www.lenaehrenberg.com and get 14-Steps to Having Fun Dating! It’s a roadmap to fun, and it will save you from taking any more wrong turns on your path to love.
Do you desire more love in your life? You can have more love!
Do you want to have more fun dating? You can have more fun!
Don’t know where to start or how to get to the next rung of the relationship ladder? I would love to help! Please contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org and we can schedule a free, 20 minute phone call so that you can tell me what you believe is holding you back and I can offer you at least one, specific, action you can take that will change your results.
What if today is the day you take an action that propels you forward into the rest of your happy, loving, romantic life!
Right now, take a moment and affirm to yourself:
I show my heart, my soul and my face to the world – no hiding!