I had the best time at Speed Dating! It was held on a sunny Saturday afternoon on the second floor of a restaurant overlooking the water. The women all sat in high-back chairs at tables along the windows and the men got to do the moving. Two amazing things about this arrangement occurred to me immediately.
The first is – I felt like a queen! I sat on a throne while 21 men came to me one by one, sat down and did their best to be dazzling – what more can you possibly ask from a Saturday afternoon? 😉
The second is – because of the sun coming through the windows into their eyes, and us sitting in high-back chairs the men saw us all almost in silhouette. Some of them mentioned not being able to see me very clearly. So they had to rely on hearing what I said and I got to see them very clearly! Usually it’s men who go by what they see and women who go by what we hear, so this turned science on its ear! I saw, and told a couple of men that they had beautiful eyes, sparkly greens and blues – how often do women notice men’s eyes? How often have you ever noticed, appreciated and complimented a man’s eyes?
Afterward I shared my experience with a woman I’d just met and she said she’d wanted to try Speed Dating but couldn’t get any of her friends to go with her. Huh? Why in the world would you want to go to any singles event – much less Speed Dating with a friend? (Or many friends, for those of you who tend to travel in packs or posses.)
Let’s say you did decide to go with a friend. And let’s say that friend and you are similar in look, in style, in age, in personality… It could happen. I have a friend who looks more like my sister than my sister. Even if your friend and you look nothing alike, the scenario might still go something like this:
You’ve completed your event and it’s time to choose the men you’d like to meet afterward. What if you and your friend choose the same men?
Will you decide to let your friend ‘have’ them, so as to preserve the friendship (or because you think she deserves to have love and you’re okay spending every Saturday night for the rest of your life watching Antiques Roadshow?)
Will she let you ‘have’ them for the same reasons?
If either of you allows the other to ‘have’ them (and I keep putting this word in quotes because they’re really not yours to give) then what’s the point of you spending hours doing your hair and makeup and driving across town to attend this event if it wasn’t so you could meet men?
If you both decide to throw caution to the wind and choose the same men, what will happen if:
They choose you and not your friend?
They choose your friend and not you?
If you both choose the same men and those men choose one of you and not the other, well, I truly believe that would test the self-confidence of even the strongest woman I know, at least for a little while, and it would probably test the bonds of the friendship as well. Why risk it?
When it comes to singles events do as the title suggests – Be Single! You can always txt your friend afterward. Tell her how much fun you had and that you bought her a ticket for the next one!
I know you can do it! I also know you will feel so much better on the other side! And if you need help, I’m only a click away.
Do you desire more love in your life? You can have more love!
Do you want to have more fun dating? You can have more fun!
Don’t know where to start or how to get to the next rung of the relationship ladder? I would love to help! Please contact me at info@lenaehrenberg.com and we can schedule a free, 20 minute phone call so that you can tell me what you believe is holding you back and I can offer you at least one, specific, action you can take that will change your results.
What if today is the day you take an action that propels you forward into the rest of your happy, loving, romantic life!
Right now, take a moment and affirm to yourself:
My intention is always to do well, be well and act from my highest self!